Disgraceful

This is just wrong.

Is nothing sacred anymore? What lowlife piece of trailer trash desecrates Big Boy!?! Wait, I just answered that...

My beloved boy with the big, blue eyes, jet black hair and squeezability has been transformed into a hill-squatin' (I really don't know what that means, but it sounds bad) mascot! NOOOOO!

Some of my best childhood memories involved Dad grabbin' a sack of Big Boy burgers on the Fridays when he and Mom had a little extra cash. We would drive our "new" beater car to the local airport and watch the planes land. Yummy, juicy double-stacked burgers with special sauce... and fries. Ah, those were the days.

And now, the poor boy has obvious pit and crotch issues, might like dick, and has a Hitler mustache.

I'm praying to the Gods of All Things Good that Big Boy had the last laugh and crushed his stank-breath violators with the burger that's supposed to be in his raised hand! But I'm afraid that some redneck is using the burger as a coffee table, or even worse, as his part of his love nest. Vurp.

By the by, my friend snapped this photo on the way to a sales call. I guess the folks out in the country have nothing better to do than pull some cow teets and desecrate a part of Americana!

I'm okay now... deep, cleansing breath.....

xoxo,

RiRi