Dwoink

That's a word my bff's 11-year-old daughter likes to throw around. Guess it's the little kiddie version of "douchebag." No real definition for 'dwoink,' except it can be applied to most mouth-breathing idiots that roam our fair Earth.

Dwoink reminds me of the sound a turd makes when it hits the bottom of the bowl, or in words: Jon Gosselin.

Clearing out $230,000 from a joint bank account is wrong. And it violates an arbitrator's ruling. And it's wrong. I guess he forgot that Happy Meals don't grow off trees in the backyard. Or maybe he thinks his 8 children are old enough to work for money to buy the food and clothes and other things they need. Did I mention this is wrong?

Either this motherfucker is insane or he's just a complete pube. Or perhaps a bit of both. Again, real men of this world, I implore you to ask this cretin to hand his balls back. Kick him out of the club.

Dwoink, indeed.

xoxo,

RiRi

P.O.S.

This is Tracey Isabitch, "The Biggest Loser" Contestant...

And one of the biggest psycho whorebags I've seen on the show.

She has those 'crazy eyes.' And on this week's installment, she basically fucked everyone over. Yes, game play is a part of this show. But she's just a lowdown, con artist who really believes her own bullshit. In one challenge, she ate a bunch of cupcakes so she could control the game. She won. Bitch ain't ever seen a cupcake she hasn't shoved between her cheeks. So, she got to pick which member of each team would have their weight loss count. Oh, props to trainer Jillian for cussing this turd out. I think I'd like to kiss Jillian... but back to the story.

Hatecy screwed everyone over. Then, she gets on the scale and pulls an 11-pound weight loss, which is huge. Like her ass. NO ONE clapped for her. Great shot of trainer Bob who was about to clap and didn't. Then she was all pissy because no one clapped for her. Suck it.

Previews for next week's show alludes to a possible injury for the bitch. Oh if karma played out that quickly..... I want to say I hope she falls into a boiling vat of chocolate, cuz wouldn't THAT be ironic, but I'm gonna try to be nice. Ha.

Can't wait to see Tuesday's show!

xoxo,

RiRi

P.S. POS stands for Piece of Shit. XL in this case.

Want some cheese to go with that whine?

This might be the biggest toolbag roaming Planet Earth right now. And trust me, the competition is stiff. This pansy-ass motherf*cker is crying to Us Weekly mag that he "took a lot of abuse" from Kate.

Obviously, not enough. When I watched the show, at first, I did feel sorry for this dolt. Brow beaten all the time by the overbearing Kate. But now I know why-- you're a mouth-breathing, no working, ho-humpin' fool! She abused you?

Check out this quote from the modern day Confucious: "She'll call me, almost like a lame fish. Like I wasn't going anywhere." What in God's name does that mean? You talk like Beavis and Butthead!

If we give you a skirt, a tampon, some Midol and some chocolate will you STFU?

I'd call you a douche, but a douche has some purpose.

Rant concluded. Don't make me get all Old Testament on you....

xoxo,

RiRi