Oh, Ma!

Just when I think Mom couldn't be more... well, Mom-ish, she strikes again. It's bad enough that it's a given that during any phone conversation, irregardless of the topic, I am always subjected to questions about my pesonal life. Mom tries to "dance" around the topic using phrases such as "man friend" and "special friend." It feels like some bizarro douche commercial gone wrong.

Anywho, this time was different.

As we were nearing the end of this 45 minutes of Hell, I thought God was smiling down upon me-- I escaped without one single question about my personal life!?! Praise the Lord. And then, with His wicked sense of humor, God flipped me the bird.

====================

Mom: Can I have a copy of your monthly company newsletter?

Rita: Sure. Why?

Mom: Because you said Albert's (my beloved dog) picture was featured and he won the Best Dog with Toy contest.

Rita: Okay... if it's that important to you.

Mom: Well, Albert's the closest thing I'll have to a grandchild. I have to be proud of something.

====================

Ouch. I didn't see that one coming! Thanks for that kick to the ovaries. It's a wonder I don't need therapy. That's what booze is for.

xoxo,
RiRi