Knockin' some sense into our Hollywood babies-- just like momma would!
3. Joanna Krupa
Offense: Sour grapes
This model/actress/air polluter is talking smack about "Dancing With The Stars" pretty boy Maks. Their spat goes back to that stupid show "The Superstars," where Maks won. Crappa says Maks is too impatient to work with anyone on the show, so she's glad she's not partnered with him. Whatever. We'll see how it all goes down on the show. Why don't you put your money where your mouth is? Or your foot? Or some duct tape? Anything that will make you zip it!
2. The Jackson Family
Offense: Beyond tacky
Yes. Jacko had some cash flow issues-- like no cash. But for the family to allow the funeral and after party to be taped? Come on. A&E is gonna use the footage and then there's gonna be a DVD. For sale. It's okay to occasionally draw a line and not step over it. Are you listening, Joe Jackson? Cuz we all know you're the one counting the chump change-- you knave!
1. John Mayer
Offense: Raging hormone
Guess when Johnnie's momma always told him to have a 'plan B' he really took it to heart. Well, actually--to his pants. His Plan B is supposedly Kristin Cavallari. Obviously, he's familiar with her "Hills," spending two years exploring the mountains while each of them were between regrets. I swear, his "little friend" is an act of his own. Perhaps John can do this whole new ventriloquist act, or a street corner pee-pee pantomime, or an illusionist-- watch me disappear into any available crotchal canyon...
Get ready. Here. It. Comes. SLAAAAAP!
xoxo,
RiRi
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